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User talk:Niobium2
Welcome Hi, welcome to Creepypasta Wiki! Thanks for your edit to the Hen Tensl page. Please be sure to check out all the Site Rules, as it is important to follow them. Failure to abide by them may result in your account being blocked. Read some new pastas by checking out or browse by topic by checking out the Genre Listing. Please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything! WhyAmIReadingThis (talk) 01:37, November 5, 2015 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:40, November 5, 2015 (UTC) Re: Story The story was actually deleted due to it being below our quality standards. Starting with the basics, don't indent paragraphs as they can cause formatting issues. Additionally this isn't the correct method of writing content. "The following passage is a true account of what happened to me in the late fall of 2014. I know that sounds terribly corny and you’re likely inclined to believe it’s false before you’ve" Capitalization issues: "I was a bored High School (high school)", "My Dear (dear) M", "Love and Luck (luck), M.", " Do Take (take) care! M.", etc. Wording issues: fragmented sentences: "Anyways, as to the story.", "Such a purpose?", etc. Reputation/redundancy: "...occult, the obscure, and the hidden" all imply the same thing (like murder, homicide, and killing) Awkward wording: "In the fall of 2014 I was doing an internship at a business that as of yet I will not name.", "I think it’s best if this story, which has long since concluded, remain shut." Wording issues cont.: I'd also avoid starting so many sentences with conjunctions (but, because, end, etc) as it gives the story a stilted feel. " And I woke up. I turned to my clock,", "But most of it was just curiosity.", "But more for my own sake than theirs", "But in this particular sleep I walked for minutes, approaching the light.", "But I was tired,(comma not needed) and confused, ready to be done with our ordeal.", etc. Punctuation issues: you forgot to use commas a number of times when there was a pause indicated in sentence flow. "In the fall of 2014 I was doing an internship at a business", " Suffice to say it was an architecture firm.", etc. Commas missing before dialogue: "of(,) “Wow, what will you do now?”" Story issues: the frequent abbreviation of character names (B, E, M, L, etc) really impedes characterization and development. Additionally I feel like the dream sequences need a bit more fleshing out as they seem to be the driving force for the story. I hope this helps, I would advise taking your story to the writer's workshop for additional feedback before making a deletion appeal. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 02:08, November 5, 2015 (UTC) :I'd wait for feedback on the writer's workshop and then either contact me/another admin or make a deletion appeal. Rushing through and making an appeal too soon are how a lot of appeals get turned down. Patience is key here. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 02:45, November 5, 2015 (UTC)